Insensitivity

A couple weekends ago I went to a party with Pete and Jon at a really nice house in Beverly Hills that Lance Bass of Nsync fame was renting and Andre Agassi reportedly (and by this I mean Jon told me) bought for about $15 million. We get there and introduce ourselves to some of the people (Pete knew mostly everyone there. Jon and I did not).

We grab some beers from the fridge and continue with our evening of drinking (I had done a lot of drinking at my house before we went over there). We gave ourselves a guided tour (there's a video somewhere Jon made. It's really quite good. You should watch it if you feel like contacting Jon) and eventually wound up on some porch with one of Lance's really good friends from high school that Pete knew from show choir.

I found out that she was from the South (I think Louisiana...) because she had a thick accent. Me being the fun-loving guy that I am decided to tell her how I think all people from the south are morons and probably said they're all in-bred hillbillies (that last part I don't know if I said but I'd assume so. I tell Tyler he's one every time I talk to him).

I didn't think my comments were all that harsh and she was actually fairly intelligent but I just like to believe that all southerners are dumb. Just listen to them talk. Sure the girls sound sweet with their twang and polite demeanor but everyone just sounds dumber (have a conversation with Tyler and ask him about "gigabytes." The stupid red-neck pronounces it "gi-gah-biites." If you don't know Tyler just go to a waffle house sometime and talk to the workers there. They help reinforce my views on the south handidly).

Well apparently my comments stung her overly sensitive nature and she was not thrilled about it. Calling her old probably didn't help either. In my poor defense though I always mock Pete about being old and feel that anyone over 30 should be resigned to me mocking them about their age. It's science.

She apparently was annoyed enough to suggest my friends drop me off on the way over the second night because of my uncensored mouth. To Jon and especially Pete's credit they told the people I was coming with them and would be on better behavior.

When we arrived I got out of the car and apologized. I said my comments were in jest and that I was sorry for offending her. I think I told her that I just have a tendency to make fun of a lot of people because I'm immature (I say I think I said that because once again I had been drinking a lot and don't remember the particulars of this moment. I apologize a lot. Go figure).

I was allowed back in the house and had a couple beers with everyone. The cute girl Jon and I were both hitting on from the night before was sadly not there. She hasn't returned any of Jon's texts either that he's sent since. EPIC FAIL.

But he got her number and I didn't.

The Miracle Poster!

Jon and Pete officially kick ass. They went above and beyond in a way I never expected them to for my birthday. They got me a poster for the movie "Heat" (arguably my favorite movie of all time) in a really nice frame and it was autographed by MICHAEL MANN!

The autograph says "Happy Birthday George!! - Michael Mann" I got two (!!) exclamation points! I had a Mr. Spicy Meat-a-ball size shit-eating grin on my face all night (Dave always walks around with a giant, shit-eating grin on his face. Probably because he considers eating shit a delicacy).

Michael Mann is the director of the movie and one of my favorite directors if not the top favorite. From what Jon and Pete told me it was quite an adventure to get the poster signed. For them doing that I will probably now do anything they ask of me short of certain illegal activities (not all though).

I'll get a pic of the autograph up soon. It's a thing of beauty.

p.s. Happy Birthday Michael Mann!! (it's his b-day today and just thought I'd return the favor)